


If We Only Tried Harder

by GraciousK



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, The Last Jedi
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Family Issues, Rey says yes, Reylo - Freeform, Spoilers, Unhealthy Relationships, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-01-25
Packaged: 2019-03-02 20:40:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13326078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GraciousK/pseuds/GraciousK
Summary: SPOILERS for The Last Jedi. The eventual Major Character Death in this fic is the same as in TLJ.What if Rey tried harder to convince Ben to save the fleet? What if Kylo Ren tried harder to convince Rey to stay? What if Leia had the chance to talk to her son, face to face? Here's what my take on what that might have looked like.





	1. Chapter 1

Rey and Ben stood in the burning throne room, surrounded by the red-cloaked bodies of the guards they'd killed. The Supreme Leader lay in two pieces, his bottom half still seated on his former throne.

Neither of the survivors gave the corpses a single thought. All of Ben's attention was on Rey, while Rey could only focus on the viewport. She peered through the lens there, her heart pounding. She watched as the First Order fleet continued to bombard the helpless rebel transports, which could only press forward in desperate flight. Her people were dying. Her friends.

But there was still time. Rey spun around to address Ben. "Order them to stop firing," she said. "There's still time to save the fleet."

Ben took a few deliberate steps towards the command console before his feet dragged to a stop.

Rey's heart sank. "Ben..."

"It's time to let old things die." Ben turned to approach Rey instead. "Snoke. Skywalker. The Sith. The Jedi. The rebels. Let it all die." There was inexplicable hope on his face as he stopped in front of her. "Rey, I want you to join me," he offered, extending a gloved hand. "We can rule together, bring a new order to the galaxy."

"Don't do this, Ben," she begged. Her voice was low, almost a whisper. Her eyes glistened with tears. "Please don't go this way."

"No- no, you're still holding on!" His voice rose to a shout. "Let go!"

"You can stop this," Rey insisted. Before Ben could start yelling again, she reached out and placed her hand in his. It arrested him in place. Rey cast about for something that he might actually care about, something that might get through to him. "Ben, your mother..." Tears threatened to spill from her eyes, but Rey refused to drop his gaze.

His face transformed, growing softer. "She's dead."

"No, she's not," Rey said, squeezing his hand in hers. A flicker of hope kindled within her. "Ben, she's alive. Can't you feel it?"

He searched his feelings, reaching into the depths of the Force.

"Leia is alive," Rey vowed. "And sh-" Rey's voice quavered, tears spilling down her cheeks. "And she loves you. Ben, I-"

Rey was trying not to sob, but it made it hard for her to speak. She looked down, blinked the tears out of her eyes, looked back up to see that Ben was crying too. Rey could feel the conflict within him. She clutched his outstretched hand with both of hers and begged. "Save her. Save them."

"If I do, will you stay?" he asked, voice thick.

"Please," Rey begged.

"If I do it, will you stay?" he demanded, louder.

Rey reached out with the Force, felt the contours of her lightsaber just a few feet away... but she also felt Ben's heart, struggling towards the light. It was the reason she had come to him in the first place.

All Rey could do was nod.

Ben took a step towards her, and for a moment Rey braced herself for his touch- and then he was past her. He went to the command console and activated the holo projector. With a flicker, a facsimile of General Hux sprung to life. Hux's head swiveled on his neck to face the holographic intrusion on his bridge.

"Cancel the attack, General" Ben said.

Hux's face pinched up. "What?"

"Stop firing. Stand down."

"The rebels are utterly defenseless; I will not waste this opportunity-"

"By order of the Supreme Leader, stand down!" Kylo insisted, louder. "Obey or face the consequences."

As Hux sputtered an objection, Ben jabbed the console with a finger, cutting the transmission short.

Rey was already at the viewport again, peering through the lens, counting the seconds since the last barrage. When she got to thirty, she let out a breath she didn't even realize she'd been holding. The transports continued unimpeded; the Resistance capital ship turned, presumably spinning up its hyperdrive for a final escape. They were saved.

Rey turned around. Ben stood barely an arm's reach away, watching her silently, tears running freely down his face. She looked up into his eyes, searching. "What happens now?"

He reached out to her, clasping her shoulders with his hands, gripping her as if to make sure she was real. "That depends on us," he said.

They looked into each others' eyes in wordless conversation. The Force flowed through them, commingling their feelings. There was uncertainty there, but also relief. Gratitude. Even, maybe, hope. No matter what came next, neither of them would face it alone. Right now, that was enough.

Rey lifted one hand and gently placed her palm against Ben's chest, over his heart. He moved one of his own hands to cover it.

A flash and a thunderous cracking noise assaulted their senses, interrupting them, making them flinch. In the next instant, gravity failed. Both of them were pitched into the air, ripped away from each other's grasp. They had barely an instant to react - Ben reached out, screamed, "Rey!" - Rey braced for impact - before they were slammed into the ground and unconsciousness took them.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Undergoing editing based on the DVD/Blu-Ray release of TLJ. Please stay tuned for an updated version of this chapter!

Rey woke in terrible pain. Her head throbbed, and her vision swam. The stink of smoke and corpses filled her nose. She forced herself to sit up through a wave of vertigo, her left arm aching as she braced herself against the ground. She fought through the dizziness and pain to assess her situation.

Fire still licked at the remains of the curtains that had shrouded the throne room, now fallen or burned away to reveal metallic paneling. Nothing moved but the flames. Rey scanned the bodies that littered the ground, glancing over the pieces of Snoke's corpse, looking for black cloth among the red. Every turn of her head sent the room spinning. Finally she spotted his crumpled body, flung even further away from the throne than she was.  _Ben!_

She tried to stand, stumbled, fell forward. Pain shot up her wounded arm as Rey caught herself, making her wince and hiss. Ignoring the pain, she scrambled over to Ben on hands and knees, the ground swaying underneath her. She skidded into his side, shoving her fingers into the soft part of his neck, under his jaw. She pressed until she could feel the steady throb of his pulse. Then she allowed herself to slump into him.

She lay there, head spinning, feeling Ben's chest rise and fall under her. He was alive. They were alive.

Her panic subsided, but her vertigo did not. Rey closed her eyes and centered herself, trying to will the room to stop swaying. One of her hands fumbled past Ben's body to press fingertips against the smooth tile of the floor. She focused on her breath. Inhale, then exhale. Rey reached within herself.

She was dazed, but healing. There was an imbalance within her, an internal injury. She inhaled. Felt the Force flow through and around her. Exhaled. She felt the floor under her fingers, Ben's slow breathing, the bodies in the room, the fire still consuming. Inhale. She felt the souls on board, their fear, their pain. The chaos of thousands of minds buzzing at once. Exhale. She felt the great gaping hole in the ship. It was rent completely in two, devastation on an incredible scale, across the whole panicked fleet. Inhale. She could sense the nearby planet. The presence of loved ones. Leia, a bright spot in the Force. Afraid. Alive. Exhale. Beyond that were planets, and moons, and stars. Life and death, growth and decay, in an endless cycle, all across the galaxy.

Rey inhaled deeply, one last time. The balance within her was restored. She rose to her knees, then to her feet.

The air was getting too smoky to breathe while standing. Rey raised a hand and closed her eyes. A spot of flame directly ahead of her flickered, dimming. She brought both hands up. The flames went out. She spread her arms outward. The fire swept itself out, following the arc of her gesture around the room. She turned, focusing, extinguishing everything, her will extending to the furthest contours of the room.

Rey opened her eyes. She knew with certainty there was a shuttle nearby, down a corridor tucked away in the wings of the throne room. Ben was out cold. This was her chance to run.

One of her hands moved to touch her opposite wrist, feeling for the cloaked binary beacon she still wore. If Rey left now, there would be enough time to rendezvous with Chewbacca and rejoin the Resistance.

But she'd given her word. Rey turned back to Ben, considering his prone form. There was good in him. She felt it. More than that, she had seen it in action. Ben had protected her. He had saved the fleet. At least Rey knew he wasn't so far gone as to stand by while his mother died. Though if Rey hadn't been there...

She stepped closer, studying Ben's upturned face. At the very least, Rey knew he felt something for her. If she stayed, she could still turn him towards the light. She knew she could.

The sound of the door sweeping open caught Rey's attention like an alarm.

General Hux strode into the room with purpose. His pace carried him several steps toward the throne before he realized what he was seeing. He stopped short, eyes wide.

With hardly a thought, Rey pulled her saber to her hand, standing defensively over Ben's body.

As Rey's saber ignited, Hux's hand flew to the blaster at his hip. Rey saw him begin to bring it up as if in slow motion. She threw up her hand and reached out with the Force, grabbed, _yanked_. The blaster flew out of Hux's hand and clattered to the floor between them.

The pair froze, fixed in each other's gaze, both with one hand outstretched, illuminated in the blue glow of Rey's lightsaber.

Hux bolted for the exit.

Rey knew if he ran he'd be back, soon, with more. "Wait!" she shouted.

She had not put any Force into the command, but Hux still flinched to a stop.

"This isn't what it looks like. Ben is alive."

Hux's head turned. "Who?"

"Kylo Ren. He's alive." Rey watched Hux turn around, slowly, until he was facing her. "He's here," she gestured. "Whatever harmed him, it wasn't me. Something happened to the ship."

Hux was too busy taking in the scene, the bodies, the smoke. "You..." his face twisted, lips trembling. "You killed... Supreme Leader Snoke," he said, half-awed, half-horrified.

"I didn't," Rey blurted out, knowing it wouldn't make a difference. She couldn't let him run for reinforcements, so she kept talking, slowly advancing around Ben's prone body. "But it doesn't matter." She held the saber behind her, with her other hand outstretched, palm out, as if approaching a skittish animal. "I made an arrangement with- with Kylo Ren."

Hux's gaze snapped to her face. Rey held herself very still, trying to project an air of calm. Hux's eyes narrowed. "An arrangement?"

"For my safety, and the safety of the Resistance fleet."

Hux blinked at her. His lip curled in disgust, or anger. "You're insane." He took the slighest step backwards.

Rey tensed, ready to give chase. She knew she could grab hold of him with the Force, freeze him in place, keep him from running. She'd seen Ben do it half a dozen times, even felt him do it to her. She just didn't know how.

She inhaled, reaching out to the Force-

-in that instant, Hux turned, bolting-

-and was halted in place, arms suspended at his sides, legs extended downwards, boots barely in contact with the floor.

Rey blinked. She hadn't expected it to be quite that easy.

"Mind your language, General," came a deep voice, just behind her. Rey turned to see Ben propping himself up with one hand, the other extended towards the paralyzed Hux. "When speaking to your queen."

Hux's head turned. "My qu-?" The word was abruptly cut off as Ben curled his fingers in the air, then  _pulled_  - and Hux flew towards them, landing flat on his backside. He skidded across the floor past Rey and thudded into one of the Praetorian guards' red-cloaked bodies.

As Hux lay regaining his breath, Rey turned to Ben. "Queen?" she echoed, completing Hux's thought.

Ben hauled himself to his feet, visibly unsteady. He kept his knees bent, his stance wide, his spine hunched, bracing himself with his hands on his thighs. He managed to tip his head up at Rey, met her gaze with glassy eyes. "You stayed."

The awestruck gratitude in his voice pulled at Rey's heartstrings, but her reply was more pragmatic than emotional. "I kept my end of the bargain. You need to keep yours. Leave the Resistance in peace."

Ben's face twisted, his head dropping, eyes closing. He took a heaving breath. "For how long?"

"As long as I stay," Rey insisted.

Ben snorted, halfway between a scoff and a laugh. "They'll keep coming. They won't stop."

"Neither will I," Rey said fiercely. She straightened her shoulders, set her jaw. Her lit lightsaber still blazed in her hand, but Rey let her sword arm relax. After a moment's thought, she switched the saber off. "You won't kill me." She saw in her heart that it was true. "And if you want me to stay, you won't kill them either."

Ben took a couple of panting breaths, drawing strength from the pain in his limbs. His eyes squinted shut for a moment as Ben centered himself. When they opened, he was steady. He drew himself up onto his feet. "I won't stop the First Order fleet from defending itself."

Rey stepped towards him. "It doesn't have to come to that. We could end this war. Today." She extended her hand to him, palm up. "You, and me."

Ben looked at her outstretched hand, then up into Rey's face. Hope radiated from her, bright and warm as the sun. His fingers itched to intertwine with hers, but his insides twisted, light struggling with darkness. Tears welled in his eyes. His hand began to rise, slowly.

"Have you gone mad?!" screamed Hux, turning both Rey and Ben's attention to him as he rose to his feet. "In the name of the Supreme Leader," he yelled at Ben, pointing at Rey, "kill this rebel scum!" In the beat of silence that followed, Hux had time to see the soulful expression on Ben's face. He responded with a disbelieving grimace, and the shouted command, "NOW!"

Ben's face hardened, and Rey could feel something within him go cold. It was Kylo Ren who answered. "That's not going to happen."

"Because of your arrangement, I presume?" Hux sneered. "What could she possibly have to offer that's worth sparing her life?"

"Power," Kylo Ren replied flatly. "Her talent and knowledge can help us crush the Resistance, once and for all."

"What?" Rey interjected, at the same time Hux protested, "We were crushing the Resistance, you fool!"

Ben's head turned a fraction as he glanced at Rey, ignoring Hux entirely. "You want to end the war, don't you?"

Rey frowned. "Not by crushing anyone."

Ben lifted one shoulder in the slightest of half-shrugs. "Semantics."

"I'm not here for your war effort. I'm here because..." Rey trailed off, aware that both Ben and Hux were listening intently. "You're the best hope the galaxy has for peace," she told Ben, in all sincerity.

"Peace!" Hux spat. "There can be no peace so long as vermin like you resist the rightful dominion of the First Order."

"What gives you the right?" Rey objected.

"The natural law," Hux declared confidently, "of the strong supplanting the weak. Predator consuming prey."

"People aren't prey!" Rey insisted. "And they aren't vermin, either."

"Too many act like it," said Hux. "Eating, breeding, living pointless lives, never contributing anything useful to the greater society, wasting valuable-"

"It's not a waste to allow people to live!" Rey interrupted. "There's no point in power if you're not going to use it for good."

"We put our resources to a greater good than you'll ever know. Order and prosperity in the galaxy."

"You destroyed a planet!" Rey shouted. "You blew up my home. You invade peaceful places with an army of slaves, killing without thought. That's not prosperity, it's tyranny!"

Hux's gaze flicked over to Ben. "You cannot expect me to take this child seriously."

Ben's mouth tightened. "I agree, she is naive-"

"Excuse me?" Rey interjected.

Ben continued without pause, "-but her compassion will serve us well if we wish to be more than just conquerors." He turned to look at Rey's face, but he continued speaking as if Hux was his only audience. "Fear of us did not stop her from joining the Resistance. I believe we can learn something from her."

"Thank you," Rey said to Ben. She took a half-step towards him. "I know that we can make a difference. There's still light inside you. Let me help you find it."

"I've heard enough," Hux said. He advanced quickly, using his stride to hide the subtle movement of his right hand as he palmed the knife hidden in his sleeve. He was almost to her, monomolecular blade at the ready, when Ben threw a hand up to halt Hux in place.

Ben barely twitched a finger, and Hux's body rose into the air. The knife fell from his hands and clattered to the floor. Hux clutched at his neck. His face began to turn red.

Ben turned his head and caught Rey's eye. "Shall I kill him?"

Rey looked from Ben to Hux and back again. "What?"

"He's your enemy. He was going to kill you. If I let him go, he'll probably try again." Kylo Ren considered Hux's strangling, twitching body with an air of indifference. "He's responsible for thousands of deaths. Millions." He tried to sneak a glance at Rey's face, but she was staring straight at him. He was unable to look away from the determination in her gaze.

"Why are you doing this?" Rey asked, plaintive.

"You said you want to guide me towards the light. So, tell me. Should he live, or die?"

Rey's eyes flicked over to Hux, whose struggles were growing weaker. She tried to remind herself that he was a cruel, murderous man, but watching the fight begin to leave him, Rey felt only pity. She focused her attention back on Ben, who was stoking the most hateful thoughts he could dredge up, hardening his heart against this death on his conscience. Finishing the act would do nothing but lead him further into the dark.

When Rey spoke, her voice was surprisingly gentle. "You don't have to kill him," she said.

"I know," Ben said flatly. "But should I?"

"No," Rey said, more insistently.

Ben dropped his hand, and Hux fell heavily to the floor. He gulped for air, coughing and wheezing.

Rey shook her head. "I shouldn't have to tell you not to kill people if you don't have to."

Ben stared, disapproving. "You're a sentimental fool. Letting him live only hurts your cause."

"I didn't come here for him. I came here for you."

Rey felt Ben soften. "You have me," he vowed.

He turned back to Hux. The general was still on his knees, red-faced and panting, as Kylo Ren approached. "This  _child_  just saved your life," Ben said sharply. "You should be grateful."

Hux took one last defiant shot. "The Supreme Leader would not stand for-"

"The Supreme Leader is dead!" snarled Kylo Ren, lunging forward.

Hux's arms flew up defensively, his head ducking to avoid a blow that never came. Finally he looked up at Kylo Ren from behind trembling hands. The Sith Lord loomed over him like a dark god. Hux felt dread, and awe. "Long live the Supreme Leader."

Ben drew himself up to his full height. Then he extended an arm to point at Rey. "She is the only thing stopping me from killing you. Remember that, and treat her accordingly."

"Yes, Supreme Leader," Hux managed.

Kylo Ren nodded once, sharply, down at Hux. Then his attention turned to Rey, and Hux nearly collapsed in relief.

Rey was staring at the two of them in growing horror. With one look at her face, Ben could feel it. He swallowed his shame. Right now it was a feeling he couldn't allow himself. "With me," he commanded. He glanced back to Hux. "Both of you." Then he turned, striding purposefully towards the door.

Rey looked at Hux's shaking body, then back at Ben, who seemed ready to leave them there if they didn't follow. She jogged to catch up with him. "Where are we going?"

"To the bridge," he shouted over his shoulder, louder than Rey had expected. They paused as the door swept open in front of them.

Rey shot a look back at Hux. He had moved, bent over to pick his knife up from the ground. Fury crackled on his face. The ferocity of it made Rey's heart leap into her throat.

"Come," Ben said gently.

Rey whipped around to face him, then felt her cheeks flush as she realized how tense she was. Ben stood almost casually in the doorway, looking back at her with concern in his eyes. He reached out to her, extending a gloved hand behind him.

For a second she just stared, fighting to control the feelings roiling in her chest. Then Rey stepped forward, took Ben's hand, and allowed him to lead her towards whatever came next.


End file.
